Quibbling

by Reid Baer

You were right though
I don't think
I was all that wrong
in very many ways
I was right too
as right as you
if not more so

Copyright © Reid Baer 2003

Morning Preparations Considerations

by Reid Baer

She shuts the bathroom door
before she turns on the hair dryer
because she knows
the noise
annoys me

And in return I accommodate
her pet peeve of water
on the tile floor
by putting a towel down
before I step out of the tub

Copyright © Reid Baer 2003

The Sincerest Form of Television

by Reid Baer

Welcome to my show where I'm here
to tell you I don't believe the tube
has had any undue influence
on my family or my children's education.

If anything, it's helped my youngest
boy complete his first sentence—
"we'll be right back"—
but that doesn't prove anything bad.

It's good my middle son knows most
classic dramatic story lines
from watching (and nearly memorizing)
every episode of the Simpsons.

My daughter learned to sing and dance
like a pro playing the complete selection
of Disney animated musicals over and over
enough times to make a spy confess.

Because of modern viewing my wife
can now completely process a crime scene
in her head although I'm not sure the skills
will generate any income soon.

And me, I'm completely unaffected
with a TV blaring
in every room of the house.
Thank you for tuning in to our program.

Copyright © Reid Baer 2003

Macon & Muriel

(Got to start over)
by Reid Baer

Some designs are dead
long before they're alive

While accidents may
help someone else survive

Copyright © Reid Baer 2003