You Can Count Me Out (In)

We lay out like lethargic bicyclists
caught in the downpour of sunlight
We were murderous caravans, poised like ant-filled
castles of the soil
We were chalk-filled, crusty erasers, angry like
long un-oiled baseball mitts
Frosted, cocooned like caterpillars yearning
to sail along the shore

We lay with hands outstretched, trees
chopped down when greenies came
We were fire hoses, ready to work on the junk fire
burning from a lit cigarette
Counting bottle and knife-shaped clouds and
dreaming of children burning stars
And hoping that the wax-filled cars
will air out the leafy smoke

We were greasy, bare-knuckled fighters leading
class riots in the high museums
We were well-worn chalkboards erased, written,
and erased again
We were Michelangelo's marble, unsculpted but
within us lay Moses and the Pieta
We were a generation of sky-writers
grounded by snowstorms

Our hearts beat Tupperwares of war
crying out with Groening lines
We are the silent voices of a generation lost
to television
We are the warriors for the trickle down snorters
the hopes of those dying in the sand
We were supposed to lay out
And dream of growing old

Copyright © Amish Trivedi 2004

Vision of Woman

I have seen the image of a woman
In a bare naked winter tree
With tanned arms sprawled out
Reaching for the heavens at the edge of her nail
Her slender form broke free of frozen soil
A haven for spring's leaves

Silhouetted on this morning blown by wind
She is the barren mother of winter death
Dreaming of spring time to warm her roots
And let her be a beacon of life again
She dreams of a form-fitting, spring shearing
Pruning and plucking to beautify

It is true that I have seen her
But only for a second or two
While winter's winds watered my eyes
And in that moment I saw the beauty of death
Peeled fresh, the well-spring of life

Copyright © Amish Trivedi 2004

Lines (Written) While Walking Forlorn Down Lumpkin Street

For Emily, Whenever I May Find Her

My mind's a thousand splinters
Because I've lain down in rose-petaled sheets
And the rose petals weren't for me
My heart is a Monkees lunch box
Dust-covered and sold for next to nothing
There are too many around
I am that orange cone
Much easier to push aside than you think
I am the closed off
Northbound lane
Scattered with orange cones
I can feel the ache in my bones
And this is every uphill climb
I don't want it to be downhill, just level

I'm just starting to realize
That those rose petals were never for me
I'm not a rose petal kind of guy
I'd prefer a waterbed with
Jack Daniels instead
With a large straw sticking out
Those of us that want to die
Are never attacked from behind shrubs
It's never been this quiet on Lumpkin Street
There's at least one car to hit me
This just isn't my day
My mind is a box cut open
Allowing something (not me) to breathe

I'm beginning to see that I was wrong
You walk around in your lingerie
Throwing rose petals
And opening bottles of champagne
What was I supposed to think?
But I can see it's not for me
I'm not a rose petal fan anyways

Copyright © Amish Trivedi 2004

Not Anymore

I kill myself
Sometimes
Just to listen to the blood stop flowing from my heart to my head
And to feel the cold rush that comes with silence
Sometimes I just do it
Because it's all I can think to do
And the quiet time is time I need
And it's time I'm never needed
Because I'm never needed
Not anymore, anyways

You kill me sometimes, too
With a smile
That just brightens up my whole life in one second
And it makes me feel like I'm swallowing in air
Sometimes you just do it
Because you know you can
And the time you needed me
I was there for you completely
Because I needed you
Forever, always

You kill me
Always
With the way your smile goes his way when the wind is calm
And back to me when the winds blow hardest
How can I claim to love you when silence is our way?
How can I blame you when he makes you laugh and float?
You don't need me anyways
Not anymore, anyways

Copyright © Amish Trivedi 2004

Her Beauty Flows Through Me

Beauty flows off of her
And flows on through me
Flows on through everything I am
Flows out into my seas

Her beauty flows through me
And through everything we are
Allalivial, allalluvial!
Her waters flow so far

Her skin is smooth and
Shines in the sunlight
I cannot resist her flow
I cannot resist her might

Her body flows bare
Through everything I know
This is where the oceans formed
Ah, the Liffey, flowing slow

Dear stone, dear tree
Grace her banks with pride!
Let her flow as you wash
Wash with water Dublin cried

Great river flowing through
Mother of the oceans we are
Dublin gave you all it had
Let your waters flow so far

Every telling has a taling
And your essence is in all
You flow past Eve and Adam
On the way to Finnegan's fall

Flow on and flow through
Flow forth from the dark pool
The 7th city of Christendom
Make your son the blindest fool

Flow within and flow without
Livia flow like waters wild
And into sunlight's coming rays
Make us, Mother Earth, your child

Copyright © Amish Trivedi 2004